Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Gaunteng declare war on cricket

Cricket South Africa to be boringly accurate. This story has been boiling since the IPL but its in the last few weeks that things have really ramped up, to the point where a knife fight seems imminent.

I started to type out a summary of the situation, for those who don't know the facts, but its just so god damn boring. So, if you want the facts, go google it. If you don't care about the facts, here's a spiced up summary of what has gone on.

Cricket South Africa: The IPL is coming. We're going to be rich!
CSA members: Yay. We like money!
Gauteng Cricket Board: We will take the money but we're not happy. Change is bad!
Modi: And so we now open the second annual IPL with an advert break.
Modi: And so we now conclude the second annual IPL with an advert break.
CSA members: Let's put all our money into a pool so we can swim in it. Why so grumpy, Gauteng?
Gauteng Cricket Board: That tournament was bullshit. Modi tried to take away our parking and suggested Shilpa Shetty take over the corporate hand job business. The IPL can go get bent.
Cricket South Africa: Oh no, you didn't! Shilpa gives a fantastic handjob. You have crossed the line. Apologize or feel our wrath.
Gauteng Cricket Board: Blow us.
Cricket South Africa: That's it, no more international cricket for The Wanderers until you say sorry.
Gauteng Cricket Board: Sorry...that you have to blow us.
Cricket South Africa: You just lost yourself a test, ODI and T20 game against England. How does that feel?
Gauteng Cricket Board: Almost as good as you blowing us.
Cricket South Africa: This is getting us nowhere. How about we get a mediator to come in? Someone from the government who can sit down with us and...
Gauteng Cricket Board: The mediator and the government can go right ahead and blow us.

And that's kind of where we are today. GCB is either being incredibly brave by refusing to look the other way until its grievances have been addressed...or they are being arrogant whiny children.

Now, knowing CSA, GCB probably do have a genuine complaint. But what's the exit strategy here? Sure, The Wanderers is a great ground...but CSA can live without matches there. Can GCB live without international games? Considering the local attendances in recent years, I'm not sure they could.

Come on CSA, just get on your knees and be done with it.


Sean on July 30, 2009 at 12:30 AM said...

Great post Darren had me laughing a lot

Darren Buser on July 30, 2009 at 3:23 PM said...

I was trying to inform and educate but I'll take the laughs, thanks.

Sean on July 30, 2009 at 6:34 PM said...

I know most of the details but I liked your version better. I am just upset that I wont be able to see the english get beatten at the wanderes my home ground ( I have been waiting for them since the aussies left)

Darren Buser on July 30, 2009 at 7:35 PM said...

Yeah, that's rough. At least Centurion is close.

Anonymous said...

But it's the 438 ground......

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